I never thought that I’d be starting over like this. I contemplated what to do for months on end. After months of monitoring and observation I accepted that this was the path I wanted to take, despite the judgement.
I’m happy that I have the support of my friends. I haven’t shared the news with everyone, I will when I’m ready. But for now my son and my four closest friends have agreed to embark on this journey with me, to love me through it and to help me in anyway I need. For that I will be forever grateful.
No matter how much I tried to talk myself out of it, in the back of my mind this is what I have wanted for years, it just so happens to be occurring now.
I know the negative connotations behind it but I know that this is the best choice for me. I’m due in the hospital at 7AM, I’ve never been so nervous/excited/scared/happy in my life. Surgery is today and a brand new life will come of it. A life I’ll never take for granted. This isn’t starting over, it’s an opportunity to do things differently. To do them better. To be a better person for it, a better mother and happier me for never giving up and always making things work no matter the obstacle. After all I’m the bravest person I know.