The Hardest Chapter

The sky scraping mountains

that you turned into sand

No longer chains

Holding you back

 

These details that made you

A page turning success

The reason you view life

As if you were blessed

 

Because of the worse

You’ve been through is gone

No longer overcoming

Finally you belong

 

Yet the haunting story

Of this chapter did end

It has yet to see the light

So that you may fully mend

 

How do you expose

The truth you held close

That through the resilience

You have yet to be whole

 

You aged at a pace

Leaving behind all your friends

Grown woman decisions

Before schools end

 

This open book that you know

Ripped out pages from the past

But in order to move on

You must glue them back

 

A full circle story

For the world to understand

That the one god gave her

Was less than a man

 

This is my true story

With the last chapter in tow

Through clenched eyes and tears

Will be finally told

 

By: Me (Johanna Arroyo 6/5/2015)

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Misplaced anger and judgement

It is quite interesting that I find myself in the midst of a moral dilemma while taking an ethics class….well hit the brakes…cue the tiny violin to stop and let’s call it what it is….Drama…the very reason why, in the past I have been selective about who I allow to enter my life. I am all about remaining positive and unfortunately at times people carry toxins in their behavior and moods that I refuse to engage with.

The truth is I am having no dilemma, in fact everything is going well in my life. Occasionally there are hiccups that we must look past and move on. In my reasoning I have found that the easy way out of certain circumstances is to blame others for irrational adult actions. It is the easy way out and for some it is hard to take a long hard look at themselves and realize how erroneous they can tend to be. I am a person that if given the opportunity would leap at the opportunity to right a wrong….if and only if I am wrong and if just feelings are hurt. I don’t question character and integrity because bad decisions on my part caused a catalyst of problems. I am who I am and I make no apologies for it. I am not a self proclaimed anything and I don’t judge others based on what they should do for me. I don’t judge others…period!!!! It’s not my call to ask for forgiveness especially when my life is declared and lived in a purely positive manner to say otherwise is a complete contradiction of what I know of myself. I leave the drama for the academy awards and live my life honestly and without manipulation towards others. Honesty is my first and main policy and I see no point in feeling guilt for someone else’s misplaced blame. At the end of the day we should never “should” all over ourselves …never expect a stranger to act as you would. We are all individual and within our right to be as such. Lack of understanding or mutual-ism does not make one better than the other…agreed to disagree….but never point the finger unless you are facing the very mirror that judges you. Saying you thought you knew someone only means that they did not meet your particular expectation and as imperfect as the world is, did it ever cross your mind that you could be wrong? About the expectation or the post judgement….

I am disappointed that I couldn’t make everyone happy but ultimately I don’t have the power to do so…I am one person and I can only manage my own goals and expectations. If and when things have gone sour I sit back and think with a clear mind how if any different could my actions have made anything better. My advice to others is to think with a clear mind. Actions while in an altered state only result in elevated emotions that usually catapult at the wrong time.

If I were a book or a news article I guess one bad review fails in comparison to all that I know is true. As humans we tend to let one negative outweigh a million positives and that is a sad situation. There are bigger problems in the world and pleasing or being liked by everyone is purely impossible.
So just, “be yourself; everyone else is taken” ❤